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|__ __| | April 15, 2008
| | | |__ ___ Tuesday
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|(,_| |___/ ISSN: 1527-618X
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| | F U N N Y B O N E M A I L
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Dust off your funnybone...
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And get ready to laugh!
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A Weekly Raffle
Tom, Dick and Harry were in the pub enjoying a few quiet drinks one
night, when they decided to get in on the weekly raffle. They bought
five $1 tickets each, seeing it was for charity. The following week,
the raffle was drawn, they each won a prize. Tom won the first prize
- a whole year's supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce.
."". Dick was the winner of the second prize - a 6 month
|()| supply of extra-long gourmet spaghetti.
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| | Harry won the sixth prize - a toilet brush.
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| | When they met in the pub a week later, Harry asked the
| | others how they were enjoying their prizes.
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| | "Great," said Tom. "I love spaghetti."
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>< "So do I," said Dick. "And how's the toilet brush,
>#<>#< Harry?"
>#< >#< _....._
>#< >#< "Not so good," ;.__-__.;-._
>#<>#< Harry said, | | :-.__ .-;
`""` "I reckon I'll go | | : : |
back to paper..." | | : : |
jgs'._____.'-._: : |
-.__;.-'
view this joke online -or- SEND it to your friends NOW
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Are you ready?
T O D A Y 'S C A R T O O N S F O L L O W
(just click on the VIEW links below)
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Do you live in a bad neighborhood?
VIEW
Is it safe to go out after dark?
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Will smoking stunt your growth?
VIEW
Don't bet on it!
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What ever happened to Yoda?
VIEW
Where is he now?
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(view the best of last week's cartoons)
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National Condom Week
Did you know that this week is *National Condom Week*? Here's a
*salute* to the *new* condoms on the market!
Lumberjack Condoms
For the woody that won't be cut down.
Sprout Condoms
Add a little moisture, and watch it grow!
Helium Condoms
For those flaccid moments when you just need a lift...
KFC Condoms
When you just need to *wing* it.
ASPCA condoms
For that lil' pup in you!
Howdy Doody Condoms
When you know "what time it is!!"
Lassie Condoms
When you know she's a bitch, but you're gonna
do her anyway!
George W. Bush Condoms
When "Junior" wants to take over!
Yawn Condoms
When you're bored stiff.
Memory Condoms
When it's on the tip of your tongue.
Chatterbox Condoms
When you need to talk it up.
Cheerleader Condoms
When you want it *Rah*!
Scorpion Condoms
When you wanna sting 'er!
Jock Condoms
When it's a team effort!
Prone Condoms
When you flat-out want it.
Pitching Wedge Condom
For those special moments in the rough!
Electrical Condom
Cures the shorts in your pants!
Plumbing Condom
When you know you're gonna clean those pipes!
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John Nunley - jokemaster@funnybone.com ( `. .' )
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ASCII Art by Joan Stark | |
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Copyright (c) 2008 The Funny Bone - All Rights Reserved. ( , )
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ASCII Art Copyright (c) 1996-08 - Joan G. Stark
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